23 August 2011

When Approaching A Family With Twins...

If you are a parent of twins, especially identical twins, I think you will definitely be able to relate to this post.  If you are not a parent of twins, I do have some advice of sorts to share.  It actually never ceases to amaze me some of the things strangers will say or do when they see my identical twin girls.  I do chuckle a bit writing this post, as I don't mean for anyone to take offense if you are guilty of doing any of these things.  Like I mentioned, parents of twins would understand!  So here are my little pet peeves when it comes to strangers approaching my twins in public.
When Approaching A Family With Twins:
Please understand how silly it sounds when you ask me "Are they twins?" or "Are they identical twins?"  My girls look as identical as they come and are almost always seen dressed alike. This one always leaves me and my husband dumbfounded and it honestly does provide a good laugh for the day!

This one is probably my biggest pet peeve, and understandably so.  I understand people are fascinated by twins, especially identical twins.  All I ask is that you please have some respect when approaching my family in public.  Please do not fawn, dote, shower my twins with a ton of attention, etc. while my other two girls are standing right there.  While you may not realize it, after you have had your fill and walked off, it makes my other two girls feel pretty left out.  Especially when this happens quite frequently.  I hate to see my other girls feel left out in these situations.  I feel that all my girls are equally special and deserving of attention.

* If you're a parent of twins, I would love to hear you chime in on this conversation!


  1. And please know that you are the 100th person that day to say to me, my you have your hands full. Come up with something a little more original.
    I hate that my older daughter is ignored when people ask me if they're twins. It's amazing to me that I get asked that too! What else could they be?????? Although I once told a woman that I stole a baby out of the nursery since I really wanted a boy. The look on her face was priceless.

  2. Oh yes, the "You must have your hands full" comments are never ending, lol! The look on that lady's face must have been priceless!

  3. I get all of those same situations too. My oldest son was always eager to chime in and introduce himself as the older brother. When he wouldn't I would be sure to introduce him as Mommy's helper. They are usually eager to give him attention too.

    For the people that say "You must have your hands full", (which I do, I have a 5 year old, 3 y/o twins and a 3 month old), I play it off like it's not big deal and then I REALLY look like supermom.

    I think my biggest pet peeve when the twins were babies was everyone would assume my daughter was a boy. Even though she was decked out in pink, princess, bows, flowers, etc.

    Our chuckles would be the "Are they identical?" Besides the fact that they look completely different from each other and are b/g twins, what do you think? LOL

  4. The question I receive is "Really? They don't look like twins." Umm, I know...they are boy/girl. "Are they identical?" Umm, no, they can't be because they are boy/girl.

    Having said that, I like when people open the conversation with me because I do try to use it as an opener somehow about my son having Autism. Educate, educate, educate! :)

  5. That's wonderful that you use that as an opener to educate others about autism. :)

  6. I've had some pretty bold questions. I've been asked if I had fertility treatment and been told that I'm too young to have 3 kids. Considering two were a package deal I didn't have a choice in how many kids I have and not it is possible to get pregnant with twins natural.

    On the list of stupid questions is "do they have the same father" why yes ma'am 2 seconds ago you asked if they were identical (they are). Are they both girls? No I dress my boy in pink dresses and bows just for fun.

    Sometimes I tell people who ask if they're twins that I just happened to find 2 babies born on the same day that looked exactly alike and brought them home.

  7. I think that is a very valid point (not that you needed my opinion or anything). My brother and sister in law have twins, but they only really look alike in the face. If you didn't know it, you probably wouldn't peg them for twins. I can only imagine how left out your other daughters feel, but people who haven't had real life experience with multiples are like people who have never met a celebrity.


  8. I'm NOT a twin mommy, but I have a 6 year old boy and then a 2 year old girl and ANOTHER girl, 6 months. I get pretty peeved when people ask me tons of questions about the girls and then ignore my boy. The girls are cute and all, but my boy can actually talk, and tells awesome jokes. Say hi to everybody please.